Hrm... news... news I know there must be some... o yea, Haley was accepted into NCSA (North Carolina School of the Arts) So for her junior year she will attended the school and specialize in visual art. In my opinion that's pretty cool, I guess bittersweet in a way, but it's still pretty cool. I'm glad for her and proud to know her. Other news... uhm... it's going to rain?...

Earlier today I had to oppertunity to get high. Did I take advantage of it? No... why? Because Haley was there, I've never gotten high around Haley, maybe one day I will. Not anytime soon though, so the following will be a letter to Haley Mahoney.

Haley, I care about you like I would care about my own sister, or as much as I care for John. There are a few things I've been wanting to get off of my chest though. I met you 7 months ago, at first you were just another person in my theatre class. Soon after the film projects started I had gotten to know you, and I concidered you a friend shortly afterwards. Thanks to your magnetic personality you went from just a friend, to an object of desire. John knows I have talked more about you then myself since we've met. I guess that thing sort of happens. Anyways, a couple months back, we had a conversation at the playground on the sound about some things, I won't name them here because this is in public viewing. What I got from the conversation though was that you didn't really like what you were doing and wanted to stop. Well, over that past year, I have watched my grandmother die slowly because of cancer. Lung cancer is caused by smoking cigarettes, and also pot. I guess what I'm saying is, I don't want to see anybody suffer like that ever again, it was the most terrible thing I've ever seen. I know that your prolly not interested in what I have to say, or anybody else reading this for that matter. I've seen what stuff like that can do to people, living and dead, and I would hate for anything to happen to you. I don't have any problems with pot, every once in a while, but when somebody's life revolves around it, I can't stand to watch the outcome. I would tell this to any of my friends, it also pisses me off that a close friend of mine Shannon, has picked up the tobacco stick, or when any of my friends (especially the females ones) do anything to degrade themselves and make themselves look cheap.

I love all my friends very much, and would do anything for any of them. They all know that, I care about my friends more then myself. I would just hate to see anything happen to you in the future...

Whelp, G-ma died on the 12th at 9 o'clock. Sadly I didn't goto school on Thursday or Friday but whatever. Over the past 11 months you just sit there and kindda watch things happen, almost voyeuristic like, not really taking part in any of the action but you can relate to what's going on. Anyhoo as I sat back and watched all this unwrap I realized exackly what I don't want to happen to people I care about. This has convinced me that I do care about people and that I have sympathy and empathy and I don't want this to happen to anybody else if I can help it. Now after it's all said and done, there is a sense of relief in the family. Finally I can goto school and not worry about comming home to ambulances and phone calls with crying voices on them. I guess I can continue leading my life like it should be lead now, not having that shadow hang over my head will be a big help.
Hrm... I'm trying to think of what else to write, been to the beach a few times the past couple days. The water is getting warmer, which allows one to enter into it without his balls becomming the size of raisins. Gotten a bit of color I guess, that's never happened before too often.
School is almost over, that's bittersweet though. I have alot of loose ends to pick up in English class, including a research project and a portfolio. The Research project counts for 1/3rd of my grade and the portfolio replaces my final test. Also there are so many people I'd like to get to know better, and school is almost over so my time is running short. Haley has many plans over the summer I'm sure so I'll probably be relying on Ohioans, job and family to keep me entertained.
Question of the day, What defines a friend? and what is the difference between a friend and an acquaintance? How do you know when the 2nd party conciders you of the the two?

When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
Let it be, let it be.
Let it be, let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be


I believe the Beatles said it the best...

Today.... is Sunday... and I can already feel the carple tunnel setting in... FIN

Whelp, tomarrow is Friday, thank god. The week has been pretty easy going and such, I guess I'm getting slack... This weekend promises to be a good one, depending on how my g-ma is doing. Already have a couple little things planned. Money may be a problem, but whatever. I have several things in english I need to wrap up, I'm afraid of what my grade might be if I dont handle these assignments quickly. I'll post later, not really in the mood to write right now.

Ok people, post number 2, this is important though... I hate TV companies... they can kiss my fat white ass.... you know those little cable cords... the older ones that you have to screw in?! Those things are bullshit, one just cut my finger trying to screw the damn thing in.... damn it to hell... Fin

Aight, it's Sunday... yea I betcha figured that one out... I wish I could say this was the best weekend ever, but then I would be a liar. Gma is basically on her death bed, very very bad this time. She doesn't even have enough energy to turn over to look at somebody. It is possibally one of the saddest things I've ever seen before, somebody that a year ago was so full of life and energy reduced down to a barely living human. I guess in the end, everything will work out, I'm sure most things do. A year ago, when I found out about moving here I was pissed, pissed to the point where I concidered killing my mom, hiding the body and collecting the life insurence... Fortunately I didn't. No matter how I look at it, it has been for the better. I am noticing things in life I didn't even take a 2nd look at before, and meeting people I would'nt have even talked to in Salem. Anyhoo, these damn eraserless pencils are pissing me off.... Why the hell would anybody make a pencil without a fucking eraser? Wrote a song this weekend, recorded it, added a little sumthin sumthin and it sounds pretty cool.... problem is I need lyrics for it... I guess those will come as time marches along. Fin